How to detect parents' perinatal difficulties

It is normal for mothers and fathers to be very emotional after the birth of a child. Hormonal changes, lack of sleep, adjustment to life with the newborn, as well as their own and others' expectations regarding their new parental role can be too demanding. The vast majority of women go through a period of sudden mood swings that are difficult to explain in the first days after giving birth.

Parental mental problems

The physical and mental health of the mother and father during pregnancy, and even before that period, lays the initial foundations for a young child to thrive successfully. The health system is often more focused on medical tests, such as measuring blood pressure and body weight of pregnant women and mothers, than on the mental health and well-being of the mother and her partner, such as recognizing their tension, anxiety, agitation, increased worrying, stress and depression/depressed state, thoughts and reactions. 

Parental mental health issues are recognized based on the following behaviors:

  • The development of a relationship with the baby (mother's and father's ability to connect emotionally with the baby, establish a relationship, "bond", rejoice when they see the baby's first reactions and activities) is difficult to achieve
  • Partner relations and relationships with other family members are changing
  • Parents find it difficult or almost impossible to "listen" and respond to the baby's needs (to his/her moves and signals that he/she initially only gives by crying, and all crying seems the same to depressed parents) 
  • Parents have difficulty following and understanding what their infant can do and is capable of - according to age, as well as the stages of the child's development, his/her motivation (depressed mother or father may not understand why a one-month-old infant does not allow them to sleep through the night without interruption and may think that the infant cries deliberately)
  • Parents are unable to see the infant in a positive light 
  • They are unable to assess what their baby needs in terms of health, safety and care
  • They are not able to tolerate the immediate environment, are apathetic, do not show emotional reactions in contact with their child. 

Whether you are the mother or father of a newborn baby, if you are sad, upset, grumpy, have feelings of guilt or hopelessness for more than a couple of weeks after birth, this could indicate postpartum depression or some other perinatal mental disorder. Some women and men report not feeling any joy or excitement because of the baby's birth and no longer enjoying the things that used to please them. Although both father and mother adjust well in the beginning, problems may occur later. Postpartum depression occurs later, often between the third and sixth month after birth. 
Use some of the questions below to determine if there is a risk of developing perinatal difficulties:
1) During the past month, have you often been bothered by low mood, depression or feelings of hopelessness?
2) During the past month, have you often felt that you were not interested in anything or that you did not enjoy performing daily activities?
3) Is this something you think you need help with?

If the answer to all three questions is YES, contact your chosen doctor.

Psychological and educational support during the prenatal period (before the baby's birth) can prepare mothers and fathers for parenthood, encourage realistic expectations, discuss with them how the baby will change their lives and family life, if they already have a child (children).  

What can help you overcome difficulties: 

  • Increased family support - it can be very helpful if the spouse or another relative provides support by taking over some of the responsibilities (grocery shopping, cooking, caring for other children in the family...)
  • The mother or father (or both) can join support groups for parents of newborn children (if available at a health center or another institution) 
  • Participation in activities organized by parenting schools, starting from the second trimester of pregnancy
  • Physical exercises, jogging, brisk walking, taking the baby for a walk or a trip with other parents, good rest and a healthy diet.
  • Referral of parents to the chosen doctor for a comprehensive health check, monitoring and treatment, as needed.